15 Bad Shark Movies That Couldn't Scare Anyone Out Of The Water (2024)

  • 1



    Dark Waters (2003)

    What the heck is it about?After a scientist creates a group of bioengineered sharks, they inevitably escape, and it's up to him to keep them from engaging in a massive feeding frenzy off the Florida coast.

    Why does it bite?Shark movies tend to do well when they don't upgrade sharks - after all, they're already nature's most efficient killing machines, so they don't need genetic engineering to make them deadlier. Unfortunately, the makers of Dark Waters didn't get that memo, which is how this ridiculously unbalanced film made it into the world. The special effects, acting, and story are so lackluster that it hasn't scored a single critical review on Rotten Tomatoes, which tells you all you need to know about this one.

    Could you survive this attack? Avoiding the genetically modified monsters in the movie is all that's necessary to survive. Stay out of the water, and you'll be OK. Of course, that's not always possible, so if you find yourself in these “dark waters,” get out as soon as possible!

    16 votes

  • 2



    Shark Attack (1999)

    Photo: HBO

    What the heck is it about?An increase in shark attacks in the waters off South Africa prompts marine biologist Steven McKray to head there and find out what's going on. The expedition reveals far more than anyone expected!

    Why does it bite?Overall, the film is simply awful. It's silly, unbelievable, and incredibly campy. It holds an inauspicious ranking of 0% on Rotten Tomatoes, which effectively says “don't watch this movie” about as well as a sign reading “sharks in the water” would keep a person from swimming there. Despite the negative critical reaction and minimal audience, Shark Attack spawned two direct-to-video sequels.

    Could you survive this attack? It would be harder to survive having seen Shark Attack than it would be to survive its deadly fish. Still, being caught by a massive shark intent on dining on human flesh puts a person in the inopportune situation of becoming a tasty meal.

    16 votes

  • 3



    Dark Tide (2012)

    What the heck is it about?In Dark Tide, a shark expert grieving over the shark attack demise of her partner is haunted by the memory of the incident and can't get herself back in the water. Ultimately, a looming home foreclosure sends the woman dubbed “the shark whisperer” to step back into the sea; she leads a group of millionaires on a dangerous dive, where they stumble upon a shark feeding ground known as “Shark Alley.”

    Why does it bite? You'd expect someone like Halle Berry to avoid a terrible movie concept, given that she's an Academy Award winner. Of course, you'd be wrong; Berry appears in this monstrosity that's neither frightening nor realistic. The concept isn't terrible, but its execution is lackluster and surprisingly dull for a horror flick. The movie boasts a 0% on Rotten Tomatoes, making it one of Berry's worst films.

    Could you survive this attack? If you're foolhardy enough to go where sharks mindlessly feed on anything they can find, you're not likely to survive - it's as simple as that!

    20 votes

  • 4



    Sharknado (2013)

    Photo: SyFy

    What the heck is it about? The title pretty much spells it out, as long as you know what a portmanteau is. Sharknado is about a waterspout that grabs sharks, lifts them out of the ocean, and throws them at the unsuspecting population of Los Angeles. It's literally about sharks flying into land and being just as deadly (if not more) than they are in the water.

    Why does it bite?The premise is ridiculous, but that doesn't matter because nobody involved in making the film took it seriously, which is a good thing. It would be almost sad if they had, but because everyone went into it with eyes wide open, Sharknado wasn't merely popular - it spawned a massive franchise consisting of five sequels. It's not scary, to be sure, but it's definitely a wild ride.

    Could you survive this attack? Most people wouldn't survive a 500-pound fish flying into them, whether its jaws were open or closed! The majority of folks caught up in a sharknado wouldn't make it out alive, which is why so many die (32 in the first film) when they come face to face with the terror of the deep on the streets of Los Angeles.

    23 votes

  • 5



    Jaws 3-D (1983)

    What the heck is it about? Jaws introduced the world to the frightful nature of the great white shark, and its second sequel takes the formula a bit too far. The film, centered around SeaWorld in Florida, grabbed at the popularity of 3D technology when it was neither necessary nor useful. At first, people blame a young great white for several attacks, only to learn that a much older and larger shark is the perpetrator.

    Why does it bite?The movie took everything that made the first Jaws great and turned it on its head. The bad special effects make the shark appear unrealistic, and thus less frightening than it should be. The first film worked so well because it showed very little of the shark, but Jaws 3-D took another approach - and it didn't work out.

    Could you survive this attack? Seeing as the shark managed to breach several underwater tunnels and take people out, the odds of surviving its attack are slim to none.

    27 votes

  • 6



    2-Headed Shark Attack (2012)

    Photo: The Asylum

    What the heck is it about? A group of people get stranded on a deserted atoll after their boat sinks following a two-headed shark attack. As the atoll floods, nobody is safe from the bicephalous monster (no matter how much clothing they remove).

    Why does it bite?The original Jaws used an animatronic shark to great effect, but that doesn't mean every movie can follow suit. This film features a two-headed shark that looks more like a Muppet than an actual shark, which makes it difficult to find any aspect of it frightening. In reality, two healthy sharks would be more terrifying than this monstrosity.

    Could you survive this attack? If you're a decent swimmer (and someone slower is nearby), you'll probably survive the horror that is 2-Headed Shark Attack!

    23 votes

  • 15 Bad Shark Movies That Couldn't Scare Anyone Out Of The Water (2024)


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